The Inches - Little Band, Big Laughs
» The Inches - Spectrum, NSW - January 17, 2007
Normally we here at The Dwarf endeavour to ask thought provoking and poignant questions of artists. These are then transcribed and written up as beautiful treatises the likes of which JK Rowling would struggle with. Occasionally however, some bands are just so damn funny we prefer to give you the story as we got it. Without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, The Inches.
The Dwarf: So you guys are rock gods right? Hows that working out for you these days?
The Inches: If we are Gods then we must be highly obscure Norwegian rain Gods - worshipped by few, feared by even fewer.
The Dwarf: Seeing as you have a gig pretty much every weekend (or more often) until July, do you ever get a chance to do anything else?
The Inches: In our down time we dream up naff video concepts involving dwarves, cultivate our farm crops, read philosophy and terrorise kids on our BMXs. Then we go on tour for 2 months and everyone gets a break.
The Dwarf: So, Between the Bays hey. What’s up with that?
The Inches: This festival has such a sexy aura about it. The Dukes of Windsor are one of the most alluring bands we’ve ever played with, except Jack the singer who is possibly a eunuch. Mainly, just the chance to share the stage with our heroes Mental As Anything is getting us aroused. Maybe they should have called it Between The Legs festival.
The Dwarf: Why are you touring with Something With Numbers (nothing against the boys, just seems an odd match)?
The Inches: It’s actually no accident we are touring together. The online dating service where we found each other said we were actually 86% compatible, so that answers that. Best of all both bands put on high-energy rock shows and love to entertain a crowd. The level of mutual respect between us is almost sickening.
The Dwarf: Has the album turned out as much like Maroon 5 as you’d hoped?
The Inches: Sadly no, when our budget couldn’t stretch to include the item “symphony orchestra” we knew we were sunk. Instead we got the guy who plays 2-string violin under the clocks at Flinders street station. We feel the results speak for themselves.
The Dwarf: Why don’t you have a lie down on the couch and tell us about the process?
The Inches: The whole thing was produced by the brilliant Jaime Jimenez, with help from a litany of engineers, in a menagerie of studios across 3 states. Benny (67 Special) did some handclaps, several SonyBMG staff members lost their jobs and catering was done by Joe’s mum. It has been a difficult birth but mother and newborn are healthy and happy.
The Dwarf: Hows life at Red Label?
The Inches: Excellent, those guys have been fantastic to us and very supportive. With the exception of the time we drank the all beer in their fridge, they’ve been complete sweethearts.
The Dwarf: Finally (the gayest question you’ll ever get), tell us three things about the band we’re not supposed to know.
The Inches: Actually the gayest question we’ve ever got was have we ever considered letting Boy George do a house remix of one of our singles. Thank you “Pride” magazine…
